a sadistic mother is the worst of all children’s nightmares: my parents, who were fruitsellers, would supply me with all the watermelons i loved to eat. when i was a little girl of perhaps five or six, my mother sat beside me while i was chomping down on an especially juicy slice. she asked me if i had eaten any seeds. i warily replied yes. “oh, dear. you will grow a watermelon tree inside you!” she exclaimed. thus, over the course of the next few years i would occasionally check my nostrils and ears for any signs of peeking branches. one day when i was an older child, i went up to my mother and accused her: “you lied! there isnt any tree growing inside me at all. see, im fine!” my mother simply replied, “dont be silly. trees take many years to grow.” and then i spent the next few years living in paranoia again.

of course, when i retold this story to my mates in college, they laughed. then someone said that watermelons do not grow on trees at all. and i only realized this when i was 18…

this picture tells that story of my tortured childhood, being the daughter of my mother (whom i love very much of course, but she is a wicked creature!). the little leaves on the bottom are actually leaves of the watermelon plant.